Cryptic crosswords are great fun, but I’ve always wanted them to reference bodies of knowledge I was more familiar with – popular culture rather than classical culture or obscure trivia. After toying with the construction of various clues, I decided to try writing my own (with the help of some nifty software). It was more difficult and more fun than I thought it would be. My style is more rough and dirty than what you’d find in a newspaper, I don’t stick strictly to the rules of composition, I don’t avoid slang, swear words or unsavoury subjects, and I err on the side of clue aesthetics over correct structure. Hopefully they are still fun to complete, and please do leave your thoughts in the comments.